can we get a bit deep?

so i just off the phone with a good friend of mine and i felt like i made a nice little point in the conversation that i wanted to share. [and get some feedback from the people :)] so we were talking about how people find themselves making comments or listing traits and qualities they find attractive in their ideal mate. that's all good. but let's check out the other side of that. imagine it's someone YOU like. and let's say they tweet or blog about something making mention to some traits and/or qualities they dig in a mate. all of a sudden, whether you know it or not, you're trying to see if you possess those traits or qualities. and if you don't, where and how can you get them?! now i'm sure it's not that dramatic but hopefully you see my point. we send all these signals or messages out about who we want to find [or find us]. now don't get me wrong. it's definitely amazing to know what you like and what you don't like. that's beautiful. but i think putting it out there in such ways that we all tend to [via twitter/facebook/blogger/away msg], it tends to guide your audience to less genuine actions/intentions. EX: you tweet something you would admire about someone trying to pursue you. they follow you and catch it OR just come across it. now they can exploit that KNOWING you admire it. and you are none the wiser because while you never personally intended for them to be influenced by it, they are now making conscious decisions to become your "ideal" person. personally i feel that the ideal person for anyone should be someone is themselves through and through. and if they naturally possess any/many/all the traits/qualities you admire in your mate, then those are just more and more reasons for you to love/appreciate/admire about them because it is GENUINELY who they are. and on the other side of things when we voice such interest in specific traits/qualities in our mate, we might start losing sight of who the people we pursue or are pursued by really are. EX: "my ideal mate would want to cook for me all the time." so now when we're dating someone and things are getting serious, if they aren't cooking as often as we would like, they're not right for us anymore? and now there are conscious thoughts in your mind that influence a loss of interest and possibly lead to a horrible ending of a relationship. we get so caught up in trying to make people who we want them to be that we don't appreciate them for who they are. they may not cook as often as we would like; but they cook. [is that not good enough?] and they know how to cook your favorite meal!...why not meet them half way? [but that's another post for another time] are we getting too caught up in looking for this made up "ideal mate"...