real sh*t

i keep it as real as possible on this here blog. but this might be a little too real for some. so ONLY read if you ready for that real sh*t. judge me if you want. this is me.

i'm a closet freak who is tired of being in the closet! now i'm not tryna be all out and about throwin my goodness all over the place. [been there. done that. i'm good lol :)] but all the girls i've gotten into serious relationships with have put me in a position where i felt i would be disrespecting them if i was more verbal about my sexuality. and i totally understand the reasoning behind it. i'm all for the "lady/gentleman in the streets, freak in the sheets". let's just say i've tried to hide this and i can't live like that anymore! i came across a blog earlier [yes you!] that seemed to awaken the sleeping beast inside of me. [lol] now i don't mean for that to come across too intensely but it is what it is. i enjoy sex very much. as i would imagine many do. and i really can't get with holding my tongue any more. i'm a freak. real sh*t. you really don't have to believe me. i actually prefer that you don't. all i know is i'm definitely into a female getting hers before i even attempt to get mines. real sh*t, some times i will take care of her and be fine with that. sex is more than just about me getting mines. that's d*mn near inevitable. for me, it's more about me tryna see how much she can handle [too much??? turn away now] i have no problem handling mine. i'm a man. and i'm down to please my woman. and they tend to be happier for it. so for all of you brothas who don't go down on your girl. [and random jump-offs DO NOT count!] you're asking for a brotha like me to come along and take them! [not that i'm into that @ all though. i respect relationships from both perspectives. being on the inside and out] because there are dudes out there just waiting to find simple *ss dudes like you slippin! but i feel like i've gotten off track lol. anyways. i'm awake now. and to you who inadvertently inspired slash awakened me. thank you! thank you sooooo much. [please stay anonymous] i hate sitting back trying to be the nice guy all the time. i have nothing but good intentions. but i can't deny my sexuality. it wouldn't be me. so for those of you who know me. those of you who don't know me. those of you who thought you knew me. surprise! [lol] take me as i am. i get down with the romance and comedy and deep intellectual stuff all the way. but i'm about my sh*t. not arrogance. not cockiness. but confidence. [old post] pretty much i'm acknowledging myself as a total package. and this sexual side has been hidden for quite some time so it's going to be interesting to see what happens now. again. you. thank you! [lol]